I Can't See The Wind,

but I feel it.


Outside of the Red and Black Cafe
on its last open night at the 'old' location,

I find an old friend whom I've met but once before, at a cafe I've stopped at but once before (but this has been a day for serendipitously-timed encounters).

I told him about the many places I was trying to be at once.

He said to follow your heart
rather than an ever-changing wind

I said sometimes my heart was an ever changing wind.
Then realized, no


***

"Listen to your heart. It knows all things because it came from the Soul of the World, and it will one day return there.

Why should I listen to my heart?

Because you will never again be able to keep it quiet.

You will never be able to escape from your heart. So it's better to listen to what it has to say. That way, you'll never have to fear an unanticipated blow"
***


To others, I would be.

think I have a persistent, creeping fear that following my heart will take me far from here.

I have Tango class tonight.
And they were right:
for an instant, you know exactly where you are,
and it IS terrifying,
because all of everything is swirling except for you.
Because you know
Amid the rapid, constant change,
you know where you are.

***
I think I am beginning to understand this line from The Alchemist:

"Yes, that's what love is. It's what makes the game become the falcon, the falcon become man, and man, in his turn, the desert. It's what turns lead into gold, and makes the gold return to the earth.

It's not love to be static or to see from a distance,... Love is the force that transforms and improves the Soul of the World.

When we love, we always strive to become better than we are."
***

A Paradox:
I constantly leave an old self behind
I constantly am becoming myself



...to be the wind...
can I ever be content to stay still? I am always leaving, always arriving -